How Can I Help My Adult Children Become Financially Independent?

Helping your adult children might be as innocent as covering their phone bill, car insurance, or groceries, or as extravagant as buying a car or contributing to a down payment for their new home. It’s normal for parents to want to help their kids emotionally and financially as they transition into adulthood.

That said, there are downsides to sharing your bank account with your adult kids. First, it can hinder their ability to become fully self-sufficient. Secondly, you might not save enough for your retirement.

Let me help you ease the process with a few suggestions:

#1 Communicate New Boundaries

When you tell your kids, you can no longer pay for their expenses, make sure to explain why. Affirm your love for them, but explain that you need to prepare for retirement.

This can also benefit them. Learning to live within their means will keep them safe when you are gone.

Approaching your kids with honesty and respect just might empower them for the road ahead.


#2 Create a Timeline and Stick to It

Give your kids some time to get their finances organized and to emotionally prepare to fully support themselves.

Don’t wait until “it feels right” or you “think they are ready.” That time may never come. Pick a date and stick to it to make sure you both follow through.


#3 Give Them Tools to Succeed

Your kids might need help creating a budget or learning how to save properly. You can share personal advice or point them towards a fiduciary financial planner.

Sometimes, an objective perspective can help remove emotion and make the next steps more logical. Building a relationship with a financial planner now can give them a head start on becoming financial literate.


#4 It’s Okay to Still Feel Responsible

You may still have a strong desire to help and support your kids financially. Even if your child struggles to afford certain expenses, it’s these hardships that can ultimately lead to growth. These financial realities can even motivate your kids to prepare, save, and budget more diligently.

Putting an end to financially supporting your adult children isn’t easy, especially during financial hardships.

However, by easing your adult kids into independence and preparing them with the tools to manage their money well, you can smoothly move towards a healthier financial state for both you and your kids.

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